Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Randomize
