I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
I told her you were a premature ejaculator. She nodded and said "Really? Wow, how long's he been a Pilot for?"
you are both the best and worst wingman ever.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize
