What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
Randomize
