its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
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