But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Randomize