I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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