I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
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