just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
Randomize