If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
Randomize
