I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
I stumbled in at 6am to find my cat in the window making a noise I've never heard her make. When I went to the window there was a goat outside staring at us.
Are you sure? Or did you just think there was a goat?
No there was a goat. I gave it a donut.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
Randomize
