I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
Randomize
