Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
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