Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
50% drunk capacity currently
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
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