Pants 0. Shit 1.
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Randomize