would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
Randomize