I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Randomize
