why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
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I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
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