I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was just giving a mobile app demo to a client, on my iPhone, when a reminder alert appeared across the page blinking "12pm: go home and give John head". You're an asshole
Hahaha oops.
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
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