I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
Sometimes you have a life bucket list item checked off like 4 tits in your face simultaneously and getting to bang them both. I'm sorry I bailed on skiing but not really. Coming over with a boombox playing 'heat of the moment' as soon as I can hail a cab cause I'm too drunk to drive still...
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
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