i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
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