the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize
