He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
Randomize
