i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
Randomize
