Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
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