dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
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