Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
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