I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
Gay?
German.
Pity.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Randomize
