We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
so let's talk penis.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
Randomize
