You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
it glows. i had to have it.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
Randomize