Texts From Last Night

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  (925): View more from California

  2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?

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  (925) 2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you? http://tfl.nu/l1ls
  Replies (11) Good night (923) Bad night (1245)
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.

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  (248): brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing. http://tfl.nu/ysyr
  Replies (10) Good night (4636) Bad night (798)
• Favorite

  (763): View more from Minnesota

  I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.

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  (763): I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it. http://tfl.nu/zncn
  Replies (32) Good night (6924) Bad night (1105)
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...

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  (617): ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day... http://tfl.nu/iy3f
  Replies (13) Good night (1218) Bad night (4761)
• Favorite

  (313): View more from Michigan

  I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.

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  (313): I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex. http://tfl.nu/ugby
  Replies (21) Good night (6221) Bad night (1276)
• Favorite

  (778): View more from British Columbia

  She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.

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  (778): She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done. http://tfl.nu/3wcc
  Replies (8) Good night (3701) Bad night (893)
• Favorite

  (252): View more from North Carolina

  Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning

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  (252): Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning http://tfl.nu/yyg5
  Replies (6) Good night (2171) Bad night (1276)
• Favorite

  (772): View more from Florida

  You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.

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  (772): You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list. http://tfl.nu/hcyy
  Replies (9) Good night (3081) Bad night (1606)
• Favorite

  (519): View more from Ontario

  Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.

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  (519): Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen. http://tfl.nu/rpyn
  Replies (9) Good night (2425) Bad night (932)
• Favorite

  (641): View more from Iowa

  yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.

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  (641): yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors. http://tfl.nu/lgo5
  Replies (4) Good night (1769) Bad night (1306)
• Favorite

  (602): View more from Arizona

  By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm

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  (602): By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm http://tfl.nu/w681
  Replies (2) Good night (1697) Bad night (735)
• Favorite

  (207): View more from Maine

  The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"

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  (207): The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!" http://tfl.nu/cz9e
  Replies (6) Good night (504) Bad night (885)
• Favorite

  (850): View more from Florida

  Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.

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  (850): Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours. http://tfl.nu/ipen
  Replies (9) Good night (2734) Bad night (532)
• Favorite

  (931): View more from Tennessee

  My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation

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  (931): My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation http://tfl.nu/stoh
  Replies (2) Good night (689) Bad night (461)
• Favorite

  (307): View more from Wyoming

  I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.

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  (307): I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake. http://tfl.nu/jx5x
  Replies (1) Good night (145) Bad night (46)

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