I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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