Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
Randomize
