I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
