was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
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