Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize