I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
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