i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
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