I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
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