Just fell off a train. Bad.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
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