Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
The guy you fucked with the lazy eye is here, im avoiding contact by texting you. But i just looked up and he recognizes me, theres no way he doesnt. I'd remember the girl who called me quasimodo all night too. Sober me feels so bad.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
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