I molested 6 butterflies tonight
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
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