So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Randomize
