Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
we tried to pick out bridesmaid dresses with pockets so we could sneak flasks in with us. what the fuck is the point of a dry wedding?
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
I think weed is turning my hair brown
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
Randomize
