im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
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