shes about as inviting as chlamydia
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
Pants are for mortals
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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