good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Randomize
