so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
So we walked by this chick's house and she starts yelling at her boyfriend "STOP HITTING ME WITH YOUR DICK"
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
At least life still wants to fuck me.
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
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