Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
I just realized I use Twitter to keep of track of when I get drunk.
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
Randomize
