I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
Man, jail baloney is awful.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
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