idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
Randomize
