i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
Please stop calling me a pterodactyl during sex. It only happens when you're drunk, but still.
Randomize